To Gift or Not to Gift

So Father’s Day is Sunday. If you’ve been keeping up with me on IG & FB, you know I’ve been dating a young man that also happens to be a Daddy.
A few weeks ago I walked into Walmart and saw this beautiful Fathers Day card intended for a husband. This card was so beautiful I contemplated buying it in the hopes I ever picked a father for my children worthy of this card. That price tag quickly reminded me that I am not yet financially equipped for that husband/father of my kids’ life.

It was then though that I wondered if my friend is expecting a Fathers Day gift or acknowledgement from me.
I pride myself on not being a liar so I wasn’t exactly comfortable with the idea of buying a “You’re an Awesome Dad” kind of card when I’ve never actually met his kid.
The thought alone reminded me of how disappointed I was a year or two ago when my mother gifted her “Lil’ Friend” a Father’s Day card after this fool had the audacity to tell her she would NEVER meet his kids. *Different story for a different day*

ice cube f that
Nevertheless, the gesture bothered me. How do I know you’re a good father if I’ve never seen you in action with said child(ren)?

I’ve enjoyed getting to know my friend thus far and I’m in no rush to meet his child. I just don’t want to be three years deep into “Plan our lives and chill” having to plan activities around whether it’s my weekend with him or his child’s weekend with him.

I’m struggling to feel appreciative of the time he spends with me when I know some of our time together could be spent with his child.I like that he makes me a priority and he has called me a few times with his child in the background, so I know the child exists and isn’t just some code name for another woman.

Bottom line is, I won’t be getting him a gift this year, not that he’s asked for one. I think a Happy Father’s Day text and a weekend spent binge watching Orange is the New Black solo while he spends time with his kid will suffice for now.

Maybe next Father’s Day  I’ll know his kid, and we can decide on a nice gift together.



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