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Double Standards…Who Raised You?

I had quite a few ideas for this week’s post, but come last Sunday I couldn’t decide. So, I took to our Facebook Page and drummed up some discussion surrounding the topics that were on my mind.

I heard a mother refer to her adult son as her “piece of $#!+” and s someone who does not have children I personally found that to be an admission of her short comings as a mother. BUT, I am not a parent.

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So, I posed this question to some followers of our Facebook page and asked “Does admitting that your son is a piece of $#!+ make you a failure as a mother?” To my surprise all of the commenters felt that the words “failure as a mother” were too harsh. The general consensus was that parents lay the foundation, but ultimately, men make their own choices as adults. One even suggested that the media’s influence causes folks to stray from what their parents taught them.

Not that I disagree with what they were saying, because I genuinely had not considered all the factors at play, however, something just isn’t sitting right with me.

A grown woman “decides” to be an exotic dancer, because the media caused her to believe they make more money. First question folks ask when a woman carries herself in a way society looks down upon is “WHO RAISED YOU?”stripper

I started this blog with a post signifying that my “Daddy Issues” didn’t manifest themselves in the stereotypical form of promiscuity. And if you GOOGLE Daddy Issues, that’s exactly what you’ll see; images of women who have seemingly made poor choices in their adult lives.

What happens if you Google Mommy Issues? Do pictures of “Ain’t $#!+” men who don’t take care of themselves or the children they produce show up? Or is it just a double standard?

I read an article earlier this week about how a mother’s verbal & physical abuse can plant the seeds of misogyny in her son. I’m a daughter and the verbal abuse I endured from my mother made me recently decide to distance myself from her, but I wouldn’t say it encouraged me to be verbally abusive toward other women. Or maybe my choice to attribute my poor experiences dating to the examples of men my “Daddy’s” are and not the example of a woman my mother is, is just a perpetuation of this double standard.

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Seems to me no one wants to acknowledge the failing mothers in the world, unless it’s in reference to a promiscuous daughter. “Who Raised You?”The same person who raised your “Ain’t $#!+” Daddy!

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